


The ABC’s of Harrymort

by Morebeforethecrown



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Bad Poetry, M/M, Parody, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-06
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-17 18:08:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29229735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Morebeforethecrown/pseuds/Morebeforethecrown
Summary: An alphabetic list of Harrymort fic tropes.
Relationships: Harry Potter/Tom Riddle | Voldemort
Comments: 12
Kudos: 107





	The ABC’s of Harrymort

**Author's Note:**

> I’m sorry.

A is for Albus, who’s manipulative and evil.  
He may or may not be the literal devil.

B is for Black, which is Harry’s Lord name,  
Or his blood adoptive family, it’s all the same.

C is for Cheating, which Ginny always does,  
Or was planning to do, and Harry knows this...well, ‘cause.

D is for Draco, who turns out to be Harry’s friend,  
Because Ron and Hermione betray him in the end.

E is for Evil, which is understandable if it’s “Dark,”  
Although Harry may or may not take the Mark.

F is for Fawkes, who gave his feathers  
To Harry and Tom’s wands so they could be together.

G is for Gringotts, where Harry can get a blood test  
To prove that even if he’s not pureblood, he’s totally the best.

H is for Harry, of course, the hero of the story.  
Being sympathetic to Voldemort is his real glory.

I is for Isolation, which you get in some fics  
When the author wants to make the Stockholm Syndrome stick.

J is for Jealousy, which Harry has to feel  
So he knows his love for Voldemort is totally real.

K is for Kindness, which Harry gets from foes  
Who are really friends. That’s the way it goes.

L is for Lordship, which Harry has all the time,  
One or two or seven or, why not nine?

M is for Muggles, who’re the real villains,  
Except when the author’s decided it’s a Muggleborn sin.

N is for Nagini, who gets to be a mother hen,  
And bug Harry about staying in Voldemort’s den.

O is for Obligatory Ophidian Themes.  
There’s _got_ to be snakes who are more than they seem.

P is for Parseltongue. At least once in the story,  
A heated hissing conversation is obligatory.

Q is for Questions, which Harry asks at last,  
And then Albus’s manipulations fall apart oddly fast.

R is for Riddle, sharp as an incision.  
(Let’s pretend making Horcruxes was a smart decision).

S is for Soulmates, which Harry and Voldemort often are,  
Either literally or because of the soul-piece in the scar.

T is for Time Travel, where Harry meets Tom,  
And discovers that young Dark Lords are totally the bomb.

U is for Unique, which both of them turn out to be,  
Something Voldemort has to help Harry see.

V is for Voldemort, who often doesn’t look like a snake.  
He has a hot face, and the other’s a fake.

W is for Wicked, which anyone is who doesn’t go along  
With Voldemort or thinks what he’s doing is wrong.

X is for Xerosis, this one Harry/Voldemort madness  
Where everyone moves to the moon in total gladness.

Y is for Yearning, which both Harry and Voldemort feel  
In dreams that help them both relax and heal.

Z is for Zippy, referring to the speed  
With which Harry accepts Voldemort because of Dumbledore’s greed.


End file.
